Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Listening closely.

Have you ever been watching Instant Star? (I reference TV shows way too many times). One thing that was said in the very first minutes of season one and stuck with me since then was a sentence that went like: "Sometimes, if you listen closely, you can almost hear this moment when your life changes. Forever."

At the moment I am sitting in this quaint lunch-cafe place, eating my broccoli-cheese soup and tomato-mozarella sandwich and drinking orange juice (Hayley writes about what she's eaten all the time; she says it attracts the audience). Anyway, I'm sitting here waiting to go to work, trying to stick the raspberries floating in my juice on a straw while pretending that I study for my citizenship education class and I hear the world changing.

Okay, that was cheesy, but I don't hear it very often; I actually wonder if I've ever heard anything like that before. For some reason I am certain that a change comes with a sound.

There is a lot happening in my life, but this is a monotonous kind of havoc. I might leave home at 6 AM and get back at 11 PM, being straight from school; my days filled with an astouding amount of chores and duties and just cool stuff that I do (if I were to live in Ryan's head I would be such a verb). But those are the things that I'm used to, I take the craziness for granted. Therefore I focus on particular activities that I do. I cross the street, the street is to support my feet, but nothing else. I do various things but I don't think how they affect my future, that they can be a turnabout.

I didn't experience anything like a turnabout, but I'm sitting in the cafe; a couple studying chemistry at the adjacent table and a girl with her English tutor behind me. She is so enthusiastic toward studying, she's inquiring, he says that those things he's about to say aren't as important and she doesn't need to memorize them all but she's going to do this anyway. Compared to my classes at school I suddenly realize that she has a point in sitting with her tutor. When I go to school I mainly go there just to go back home several hours later, I don't feel like every second of my being there is a step toward something. However the eagerness of this girl made it seem like this very moment MEANT something and that it LED someplace important.

The couple is laughing and talking about their plans as I'm trying to wade through a text on Non-Governmental Organizations. And suddenly I just hear it, I hear the change. Not like a revolution or the end of the chapter. I just hear that every little moment is meaningful and that every second changes everything. And I swear, to me it feels like a sound!
At first I didn't understand what "Life changes everything" name meant. But now I think I partly do.

Song of the day: What a Difference a Day Made - Jamie Cullum

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