I looked at the TV guide today and almost choked on a gingerbread cookie when I saw the front page title. A very prominent celebrity in a Santa hat making her way through the spruce branches, looking as if she'd found a door to Narnia there, at least. The title beneath the photo says "such-and-such: I believe in Christmas Eve miracles".
Now, the reason why I looked at the TV guide in the first place was because I wanted to check if it's in fact Christmas. Since there were no ads on which broadcasting station Home Alone was gonna be aired, I was sincerely worried that Christmas was to be cancelled. Luckily, we're saved! Home Alone is ON, this Christmas! Let's go back to the kitchen, now that we're sure.
Anyway, I was almost physically hurt when I saw that front page. I know this celebrity pretty well. I know all about her romances. I know that she ran in the competition for the most beautiful bust in the country. Now I even know that she believes in the Christmas Eve miracles. But I don't know what is it that she does. Surely she acts, probably sings, writes books and hosts talk shows. BUT. No. Nobody cares. The most important information is her belief in Christmas Eve miracles. And that bust thing of course. Weird they haven't mentioned her place in that article - Christmas has always been renowned to be the season of woman objectification.
I'm not mocking national press' choice of front page topics! Quite the contrary, I think everyone should share this important piece of information publicly! They give us so many days off, we might as well occupy ourselves with who believes in Christmas magic and who doesn't. This account is so significant I want to hear all about it.
See, I always consider a press article good, if I was to read it had it not been about the bust competition winner.
'George Bush: I believe in Christmas Eve miracles!'
'Richard Dawkins: I believe in Christmas Eve miracles!'
'Michael Jackson's doctor: I believe in Christmas Eve miracles!'
That would make my day!
'John Smith (42 years old, Tarrytown, NY): I believe in Christmas Eve miracles!'
Oh, surely it would!
Song of the day: Celebrate the day - Relient K
Merry Christmas everyone!